Ganymede ~ My Griffon :(

I'm sorry this is so long and sad, I'm looking for any help possible... we've just lost our beloved dog, a Griffon called Ganymede. He died at home on Monday 27/09/04 - it was his 9th birthday, but to us he was forever a puppy. Our world literally revolved around him and now we are totally shocked and devastated. He had been to see our vet the previous Tuesday as we were concerned his breathing had suddenly become quite rapid. The vet informed us his heart rate was within range, but his chest was quite wheezy so prescribed a weeks course of Clindacyl antibiotic, of which 2 were to be taken twice daily, we started him on these the next day as he'd just been given an injection. We were due to return him the following week, he did seem to improve initially, but then by Friday his breathing had worsened, he was coughing and urging a lot as if he needed to clear his throat, so we went back to the vet worried for the little chap. He had to be carried in as he couldn't walk the last few steps, we told the vet this and the same checks were done as on Tuesday, the vet decided it was now time to prescribe Fortekor & Furosemide ½ tablet daily of both, because the year before he'd been diagnosed with a "slight" mitral heart murmur. However Friday, the vet stressed to not worry - it wasn't heart failure, to continue the course of antibiotics along with the new heart medication and return the following week. In 2003 he went for an ECG, but it wasn't conclusive as he was overweight - a porky 12.5kg. Spoilt rotten. We were advised medication was not then required but weight loss obviously was, so we really controlled his diet for the year hitherto and were jubilant last Tuesday on weighing in - a perky 9.8kg. There had been a noticeable improvement in all activities throughout the year and the vet gave him a gold star ! The weekend passed, Sunday night we were very pleased and relief set in because Ganymede had picked up immensely - his breathing had calmed, his appetite returned to normal and he was wanting to play. We awoke Monday morning to find sadly Ganymede had declined yet again, we were shocked at how suddenly his breathing was worse, he was having trouble coughing, no barking - we decided another trip to the vet that day was required. Matthew (daddy) left for work and I (mummy) stayed. It was very difficult to tell just how bad Ganymede was because he would improve, his breathing slowed and he was able to walk around and he even perked up enough to eat a plate of chicken (ultimate occasional treat). It was a roller-coaster morning not wanting to leave him unattended, although whilst I was getting ready to leave with him for the vet, there were a couple of moments when he seemed unable to lie down and had to stand to catch his breath, he jumped off the bed and as he landed his legs were all wobbly, he then walked towards me but collapsed in slow motion at my feet. I scooped him up and tried to bring him round rubbing him, calling his name but I knew that he'd stopped breathing. His body was limp, I placed him on the bed again and made sure his tongue was clear, I could feel a heartbeat but still no sign of breathing, he started to spasm and was twitching all over. I panicked not knowing what to do first, frantically grabbing the phone, I rang our vet describing what was happening to him in front of me, she said I needed to get him to the closest vet immediately, which was approx' 10 minutes away if I ran - we don't have a car. I got off the phone and ran next door to neighbour to see if their car was available, we returned to Ganymede but as we got to him he passed away in our arms. He'd brought up a vast amount of clear watery fluid. The whole episode from moment of collapse to time of passing couldn't have been any more than 3 or 4 minutes, if that. I'm now putting myself at fault for not having got Ganymede to the vet sooner that morning. I'm thinking that if I had, he'd have been given oxygen or medication administered via IV to calm the breathing, which is what seemed to be the reason for the whole "attack" - he stopped breathing. I've since researched various respiratory and heart problems in dogs along with his medication and am wishing I'd done so long before, I've found his typical symptoms in Congestive Heart Failure. I feel that fluid had built up to such a level that he had no room left in his lungs for oxygen and this is what he purged on passing. However, after the event describing everything as above to the vet, she seemed to think it was a heart attack and said that the fluid he'd brought up was likely to be stomach contents, even though he'd ate a meal of chicken 30 minutes prior to collapse, I found this difficult to believe. The vet also stated even if I had made it to a vet, there wouldn't have been much that could have been done for Ganymede, that he may even have even had an attack of some sort Sunday night, so maybe was already in a weakened state unable to recover fully. I'm so confused with the whole situation, did he have a heart attack? I've read that this is very rare in dogs. Did the rapid breathing / lack of oxygen trigger this? Or did his heart give out prior to his breathing ceasing? I have so many unanswered questions and feel at the moment I will forever carry some blame in his departing too soon. I've been told not to reproach myself and at times have thought maybe this way of passing was perhaps best for the little man? He will be sorely missed. Our home is so quiet and empty of such a strong loving presence. Although I still see him - he's just out of reach every day. I can't stop crying ! Any advice, opinions appreciated greatly. I really need to find some peace of mind. Many thanks for reading, Helen.

hi i'm kyena's mom and i too cry every day. my boy left 9 weeks ago at 3:00 p.m. today after 11 hours of labored breathing,parayllisis and no answers.they say maybe an anurizum or stroke.i just wanted to tell you it's normal to blame yourself. i think if some thing bad happens to someone we love even if they are 100yrs old when they die we will find fault with our own actions and possibly even the actions of others.i wish i had answers for you to help you thru your pain the only thing i can suggest is calling or emailing another vet and asking their opinion.when my vet said probably a stroke i thought maybe she was just trying to get me to stop rehashing my every move looking for how i might have killed my baby.the next day i called another vet and explained every detail,she said it sounded like stroke or anurizum.i did not tell her what the other vet said because i didn't want to influence her answer.they both said it is not something that happens often in dogs but it does happen.even though it will never go away i hope you can find away to ease the pain.kyena's mom.

keep talking i'm sure he's listening.and if it helps you that's all that matters.it is always difficult to figure out who we are or what we are after looseing an extention of ourselves it will take time and i don't believe you will ever be exactly the same how could you be part of you is gone and so you will change and go on.kyena's things are as he left them i feel no need to pack them up or give them away.at first when i would wake-up in the morning it was hard to get out of bed.the first thing i see when i open my eyes is his bed where his lil eyes would be looking back at me.i would get up half way but end up curled in a sobbing mass holding his blanket.now his things are more of a comfort in the background as opossed to an obsession.i'm sure you had a wonderful life every life is different and as long it is filled with love it is the perfect life.don't forget if it wasn't something you ever did together then you weren't missing anything by not doing it.feel better if you can.kyena's mom